Monday 12th May
Song of the day: Build me up buttercup - The Foundations
This is a dubious song choice...but not terrible enough to not to publish.
So round 4...ok here goes. I woke up with a terrible headache, not exactly the start to the day that I would have hoped for. There was also a bit of self guilt in there. Had I drunk too much white wine the night before? Going to chemo with a hangover is probably not advisable and would more than likely be frowned upon. Consulting with DW we concluded it was the 'weather' so lets leave it at that. I had also had a fractured night's sleep and had kept on waking up hot. As with the first round of chemo, I didn't feel particularly stressed about going into the new drug of round 4 but perhaps my subconscious did. Perhaps another contributor to the headache. Regardless, I took some paracetamol and applied the magic cream to the port.
We arrived late. DW had thought we were leaving at 10am rather than arriving. Most of you who know him always factor in an extra half an hour anyway as he's often on the later side of things, something I know that has rubbed off on me before I hear the groans from the critics! It gave Kim so extra reading time in the lobby!
To be honest with a chemo day this doesn't really matter too much, just as long as you show up that's the main thing (it can be tempting not to)! Arriving in oncology Jill was back, which was lovely to see a friendly face. We were shown to a different room (not as nice as my normal room - I know I'm lucky to have a room) and then waited.....it turned out we had arrived at meeting time, so we ended up having to wait an hour for anything to kick off. Boring and slightly frustrating as I thought we potentially could get out of there sooner. Patience. Patience VW!
The sun was shining so Regina arrived by dancing into my room. Blood was taken to check if treatment could go ahead or not. Thankfully the port in my arm was behaving itself so it worked first time. Phew....
More waiting and then it was time to kick off with the pre meds. It was at the point of Regina hanging the steroid IV that she mentioned that my steroid dose had been upped from 8mg to 20mg. Writing the numbers down this doesn't look a lot but effectively my dose had been almost tripled. Not liking this particular drug, I wasn't too happy that this hadn't been mentioned before but on reflection this was probably a good call, so I couldn't worry about it. As it turned out, it was fine.
Jane popped in for a chat. It was lovely to see her as I hadn't seen original Jane for a while. Her son is getting married next weekend and she was having a handbag crisis....a project for Kim and I to find a bag to match her shoes! No task too small, we were on the case! Though eventually conceded defeat as magenta is not a colour this season!
Aside from the new drug the other big change for the day was the decision not to wear the cold cap. Boy, did this make a difference to the day. Given the fact that my body is pumped full of a cocktail of stuff, I hadn't really considered the impact of wearing the cap but not having to wear it made the after chemo evening so much better. A good decision.
Photo no.181 - happy chemo campers!
The main watch out with the Docetaxel is that some people may have an allergic reaction as it's being pumped into them. It was comforting to have DW there just in case and Kim to keep chatting to me for distraction.......thankfully no reaction! Good, good.
Despite thinking we'd be able to leave around 2ish, the hour delay at the start meant that we left around 4. Normal chemo departure time! We arrived at home and were greeted by nurse Lars, shortly followed by chef Maggie...our 'staff' for the week! ; )) It was great to see them and have the support for the week.
First job on arriving home was to paint my finger and toe nails. Docetaxel reacts to UV light so even when it's administered it's under a black bag, so I had been advised to paint my nails, as a common side effect is for the nails to discolour and even drop off (hang in there guys!). Beautician Kim at the ready complete with some Sexy Siren nail polish...dark vampish nails are my look for the next few weeks! Manicure and pedicure done!
Photo no.182 - pretty nails!
So far, so good. It did seem that this round was feeling easier as there was no spaced out feeling or nausea. Sure, there were a few niggles but nothing major to grumble about! At dinner that evening (Charlie Bigham Beef Cannelloni for a change!), I was given a gift from the Rosengren family. It really touched me as this gift came from the heart and it was a heart! Tusen tack familjen Rosengren! Ses vi snart! xx
Photo no.183 - hjärta - pure and simply beautiful.
So what was my wish at the end of day one? To sleep! Given the upgraded dose of the steroids, I was concerned I'd be up all night........
Tuesday 13th May
Song of the day (VW): Karma police - Radiohead
Song of the day (LH): Let your love flow - The Bellamy Brothers
Six hours of continuous sleep plus some dozing and I have to say I was feeling pretty good. A bit tired and a bright red face but overall the best Tuesday so far. High praise for the Docetaxel vs FEC at this stage. My wake up call had been planned for 10am but I was up and at them just before then! Wake calls always stress me out but it was deemed necessary so I didn't miss taking my post chemo cocktail. So best to wake up just before to wake up slightly and not resent being woken up too much! ; )
Today was fairly chilled. As promised to Dr Davis, I took the full amount of the steroids (still reluctantly but better than an allergic reaction). As normal my mum picked me up for my immunity boost jab. Regina was nowhere to be seen when we got to the hospital....not a good sign because as we all know she's my preferred person to place needles into me! A new chap was there helping out. He seemed pleasant so after a while he asked if I would be comfortable in him doing the injection. I had no reason to say no so went ahead as we didn't know when Regina would be back...mistake!!! Here comes the sharp scratch! Holy s**t that hurts....like a bee sting he said...yeah a whole f**king swarm! Sorry for the language but oh my, he's not coming near me again with a needle again that's for sure. Still, all done. Another jab down.
Some more relaxing, a spot of dinner and some sofa time and I was ready for bed.
Photo no.184 - a little help from my friends!
Would the steroids keep me up tonight? Or would the Docetaxel? This also has magic anti sleeping properties.....stop thinking and just sleep!
Wednesday 14th May
Song of the day: Daydream believer - The Monkees
Happy 30th birthday to my bro!
Sleep was had, albeit slightly disjointed but still some had been had. The familiar day 3 aching started as well from the Neulasta jab. It felt like I had done a few intensive gym sessions and used pretty much every muscle in my body! My glands had also decided that it was their time to swell, just to add to the party! But still the sun was shining, as it often tends to do on chemo weeks, so what's a girl to do.....
Photo no.185 - lounger time!
My chef was heading out for the evening, with no dinner on offer, chef V was back in the kitchen. I decided to rustle up some Luca's pasta, as the sauce is easy to make and can be left to develop over the day. Sauce done, back to the lounger.....
Time to get up lazy bones! I wanted to show Maggie to a garden centre, yep a garden centre...I'm officially old and boy my joints felt it! We headed up to Stubbings to look at pots as I wanted to replant my bay trees due to one of the pots having been smashed over the winter. Rock n roll Welinder! It's so beautiful there and there is something relaxing about perusing a garden centre....give me my zimmer now! Photo no.186 - my new friend, Rudolf.
It was dinner for two this evening, which was lovely just to be able to relax with DW on the sofa after eating. Aside the aching, I was feeling fine and mentally in the zone! I had only take one steroid that morning and decided to quit after that dose, as thankfully I hadn't had any reactions to the Docetaxel (or Docetaxel-surus as Kim calls it!). I was following a piece of advice that Regina had given me on Monday as well in regards to just going with the flow and stop constantly taking my temperature...this seems to have served me well. Less note taking required!
Thursday 15th May
Song of the day: Stay with me - Sam Smith (one of my favourite songs of the day - I love the gospel choir aspect).
Happy birthday DW! Also a birthday shout out to fellow cheese club member - Phil Cook!
It had been a hot and restless night...I was tired but sleep seemed to not be a friend of mine. Resting was the next best thing but you know how it is, things will be better a good dose of the zzzzs! My body ached baby ached, which also didn't help for sleeping quests and on top of the garden centre visit, my body felt a good 50 years older than it actually is.
Photo no.187 - indoor lounger time...a tired VW!
Enough moaning VW, you had a visitor to prepare for and a rub to make! I had planned the menu for DW's dinner so needed to make a rub for the steak...pics to follow later and also prepare a simple lunch for my date, the delightful Debbie! It was good to have both of these activities to spur me on, as otherwise a day long lounger visit could have been on the cards.
A lovely lunch in the sunshine with Debbie, complete with some tea and biscuit definitely perked me up for the rest of the day ahead! Thanks DG!
The post lunch task was heading to another garden centre...I know I can see the edges of your lips curling up....this time it was to go to the butcher! Lewis of Sunningdale is the best butcher in the area and luckily they've got a small but perfectly formed offer at Moss End Garden Village. Well worth a visit if you live in the Berkshire area. 2 large sirloin steaks procured, Maggie and I both crinkled into the car. Her back was causing some problems, we properly looked like a pair of old ladies! Next stop Waitrose for the rest of the necessary ingredients.
My day was made when tiny Daniel next door came and chatted to me and gave me a high five! Simple things....
Back home and the final task was to oversee nurse Lars building a chiminea! Success and time to relax!
I ached whether I was sitting or standing so in some ways it was good to keep doing thing....yes, I know I need to rest but there is only so much a girl can do!
Photo no.188 - the sky view from my lounger!
The birthday boy arrived home and we were all set to get the grill on and start the feast!
Photo no.189 - DW's birthday grill-fest with nurse Lars and chef Maggie!
Photo no.190 - the birthday table!
So the menu - Sirloin steaks with Pitt Cue & Co House rub, Nigella's greek salad (it's addictive) and corn on the cob.
Photo no.191 - Meat! Yaya! The key here is to buy 2x 500g pieces and then diagonally slice them for serving. The meat is juicier and retains more flavour. DW cooks them on the BBQ and turns them every minute.....perfect steak!
Photo no.192 - make a wish!
After dinner, the celebrations continued outside in front of our new chiminea...there's nothing more relaxing than watching an open fire...bliss, particularly for DW with a cognac in hand!
Photo no.193 - no belly dancers here.....
A very happy birthday to my darling DW! xxx
Friday 16th May
Song of the day (VW): Hella good - No Doubt
Song of the day (LH): Can't take my eyes off you - Andy Williams
LH dodgy song yet again....we need words! ; )
Another restless night, it seemed whatever position I laid in it was uncomfortable after thirty seconds. It was this morning, that I realised the aching was much worse than previous rounds. Something is not quite right here and actually by now with FEC, I'd be on the home straight so perhaps the dinosaur drug is deceptive in its early bliss.
I said goodbye and a huge thank you to Maggie and Lars and had a couple of hours on my own...I needed this. Chick flick at the ready...check. Chick flick tears....check. A good cathartic couple of hours.
My mum then arrived as I was due to have physio. Given the level of aches, I really didn't want to go but sometimes VW you need to man up and just go. It turned out to be my last session with Diana, as the cording in my arm had pretty much gone. I am still continuing to do the exercises, as I'm keen to prevent lymphoedema...world's strongest woman continues! Thanks Diana for these sessions, I've really enjoyed them and meeting you!
While waiting for the physio session, I decided to have a quick read of the Docetaxel side effects leaflet...ah achy muscles and joints, bingo! So after physio I popped upstairs to see Regina....I ache Regina help! She's such an angel and arranged for a doctor to prescribe me an anti-inflammatory to help with my old lady aches, which in turn would hopefully mean I would sleep...big hopes!
To finish off the week, I went with my mum to Stubbings to pick up some more gardening items, a beautiful lavender and more kindling for our chiminea. Old lady days are here...complete with groans getting in and out of cars.
The Regans had kindly offered to cook us dinner that evening, so I had time for some rest before dinner....and I found a nap position that was pretty comfortable...flat on my tummy...so a blissful power nap.
As always, laughter is often the best medicine so an evening with Glenn and Rachel really helped with the aches. I still feel for Rachel when Daniel told her that the upcoming duck race was with plastic ducks...the look of disappointment was profound. Thanks guys for a fab evening! xxx
Photo no.194 - happiness is driving a bus...bus driver Kim! This brought a broad smile to my face this evening, I want to go!
Approaching 11pm, I took the anti-inflammatory drug....everything crossed for a good sleep! Please, please, please!
Saturday 17th May
Song of the day (VW): Summer breeze - The Isley Brothers
Song of the day (LH): Make you feel my love - Adele
Bonus track: I'll be around - The Spinners
Happy birthday O!
By jove, I had some sleep...not as perfect a night as was craved but still a good quality sleep. The aches were there but had definitely diminished but oh what do we have now...swollen glands and a sore throat! Why thank you.
No time for rest though, I had the next birthday dinner to prepare for the beloved Eoin Harty! Thankfully the sun was shining as a BBQ was on the cards. What else?!
After the prep, I managed to catch forty much needed winks, as I was still a bit of an achy old lady but then a car pulled in and it was p-a-r-t-y time! The line up for the evening had changed but it was fabulous evening with the birthday boy, Luca and Kim and a late appearance from Leonie and Phil.
We also found a cracking Portuguese red in Waitrose, which went well with the dinner. So here it is!
Photo no.195 - to begin with to amuse your bouche!
Photo no.196 - the BBQ chef!
Photo no.197 - chicken satay skewers (Jamie 30 minute meals)
Photo no.198 - cheese club complete with a glass of port!
A great celebratory evening and wonderful to be in the company of so many lovely people!xxx
Sunday 18th May
Song of the day: Higher - Jackie Wilson
Some background to today's tune.....I had planned to send this to the Homer hit factory the next day and then he sent it! Bizarre!!! But whenever I hear it I just want to dance, be it in the shower, in the kitchen or the car, this one can't help to raise your spirits!
I woke up to feeling more of my thirty-something self this morning, as I no longer had the need of a zimmer frame to get around. Time to prepare for our elevenses guests, Felicity and Neil. The previous evening, I had nearly fallen out of my chair when Felicity said she might be baking! Exciting, as the kitchen isn't Miss Jones' favourite place to dwell! However, the baking gods were not on her side so we settled on some cookies instead. It was great to see them and enjoy breakfast outside, though we all had to retire as the sun was too strong!
With an afternoon to myself, there was one thing and one thing only that was required.....
Photo no.199 - summer = a mocha frappucino
On a trip around the M&S wine department, I discovered some Indian wine. In fact they seem to stock many different countries that are traditionally thought as wine producers, Greece, Macedonia and India! One to check out for something new.
Photo no.200 - Indian wine...a new region to discover!
No Sunday is really complete with taking a walk, generally it seems somewhere along the Thames. Today, we walked along one of my favourite stretches between Boulters Lock in Maidehead and Cookham. The scenery is spectacular, particularly glimpses of Cliveden and one day I'd love to stay at one of the lodges...ridiculous as I live so close by but it is my dream house.
Photo no.201 - beautiful river walking
Of course no Sunday is complete without the dinner. I was ridiculed by a couple of friends about this last night, as to who's allowed to come and who's not and what the exceptions would be...let's be clear, it would need to be exceptional circumstances to let 'outsiders' in!!! : ))
So here's this week's offering....
Photo no.202 - Pitt Cue & Co House rub on salmon, BBQ'd little gems and panzanella accompanied by Cupcake Chardonnay.
Week 10 you've given some highs and lows but overall it's another step in the right direction on the journey that we're treading! I know now the tips and tricks to try for the next two chemo rounds, so hopefully my joints and muscles can stay feeling closer to my real age rather than the 80 year old self I seemed to have discovered! As ever, a huge heartfelt thanks to everyone who made me smile and put up with any grumbles throughout this week. Another one bites the dust! xxx
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